Time to Re-boot

Here's the thing Lovelies.

Things are taking off in my business

in a way I have been dreaming of 

(and planning for) for some time.

Plans are coming together.

Visualizations are

coming to fruition.

The stream called "momentum" is 

starting to flow quicker.

Ideas that have been simmering for

some time are coming to the boil.

But  guess what?

 I am shying away from everything.

It's ludicrous. It just doesn't

make sense.

I am subconsciously

stalling the process!!

People who know me know I 

am a goals-oriented "ninja".

And yet I am letting things slip.

I start working on my to-do list and

I happily get hijacked my Pinterest,

or YouTube or even doing my

taxes (that's a sure sign something

is wrong and that medication may

be required ;-)

I am not finishing anything.

I looked at my bedside table where I have

7 new books; all non-fiction.

I have got no further than chapter 5 in any of them.

And when I walked into my little study there is a box 

of new books that I just keep piling up; touching, smelling

caressing and putting back onto the pile that is now their home.

If you even asked me what I read last night

I wouldn't even be able to tell you, because whilst

reading I am thinking about all the things I 

"should" have done that day and didn't.

So I have to go back and re-read each chapter

(or should I start fretting about Alzheimers now?)

OK, I'll just add that worry to my list?

If I watch something on TV I literally "lose the

plot" because my mind goes off somewhere else

and invites me along for the ride.

It's a strange place to be as I have never been

so "flaky" before.

Am I afraid of failure?

If I don't move forward in the 

way  I am now being called too,

I can't fail. I can only stagnate.

But that's not the same……is it?

Or am I afraid of playing a bigger game

(something that has never frightened me before).

If I start playing bigger I will have to step

out from behind my computer, out of my sweats

and become more the face of my business; I

subconsciously don't want to do this.

I love the air of anonymity I get from

having an on-line business.

 I just know I have no head-space left

for anything.

I can't even make a simple decision

like what to have for breakfast!

 So this weekend I am going to do 

my version of vegetating

I am sure I would play better if I had these

I am going to have my golf lesson.

Anyone who knows

me knows I so do not fit the image of a 

golf player. 

However it was either become 

a golf-widow when I moved 

to a home in Spain on a golf-course,

or join the party

I am going to do yoga.

Watch TV for no reason but

just because I want too.

Remove all reading material

from my bedroom

Cook.

Eat.

Sleep.

Walk.

Sweden

And call my neglected friends.

I think it may take longer than

this weekend to "re-boot"

but it's a start.

Hubs has said even if my website

combusts I am not to do a thing about

it until Monday (a bit harsh I thought ;-)

Adorn yourself with a Winter garland

What are your plans this weekend?

Would love to hear how 

you maintain your head-space?

xxxxxx